Conservative

The new “investigative” journalism

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The intensity level of investigative journalism has just hit a new high, well at least compared to the previous eight years.  Dreams of Watergate-like fame have returned for brave journalists across the country.  They don’t need their own version of Deep Throat, although it would appear that the Trump administration is riddled with sources but without cool code names, just a quick trigger on their smart phones.

A great example is the recent energetic reporter who, gasp, caught Rick Perry reading the Drudge Report.  No doubt the reporter snapped away hoping that he’d catch Secretary Perry pulling up a linked copy of Mein Kampf but apparently Drudge was the best, er worst, that it got.  See for yourself, below.Investigative Journalism3

The Drudge headline is a little blurry, likely due to the excited shaking as the reporter’s trembling hands held his phone.  It actually reads “Great Again: +235,000.”  Let’s give Perry a little credit though, he likely knew that surreptitiously browsing Drudge was the best way for positive news on job growth to get into the mainstream media’s coverage.

It’s too bad this hard hitting type of journalism is just now becoming an imposing force, otherwise perhaps a few these would have been reported.

Valerie Jarrett:  Jihadi Weekly

Lois Lerner:  Communist Manifesto

Erik Holder:  humming the RAP classic “F**k tha Police” as he wanders the Justice Department halls

Barrack Obama:  Nero Fiddling for Dummies

Nancy Pelosi:  pamphlet for Witchcraft Spells of the Month Club

Hillary Clinton:  Playboy

Those wacky Obama scamps

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Pranks

Our award-winning investigative journalism recently uncovered and infiltrated a secret society deep in the bowels of Washington DC.  What we originally thought was a  book signing for “Bringing Back the Best of Bolshevism”, was actually a group dedicated to gumming up the works within the Trump administration.  As we approached the door to the new home of Barrack H. Obama, it was clear that we were out of place in this palatial $6 million residence.  Despite our trepidation we proceeded to knock.  As a pair of eyes peered through a slot in the door, a voice said, “password please.”  With the fortunate guess of “Workers of the world unite” a series of clicks and chain rattles proceeded and, bingo, we were in.

What followed was an embarrassing mix of chants, animal sacrifices, and party games like “pin the blame on the elephant.”  The evening culminated with the chair of the Shenanigan Committee, Valerie Jarrett, statusing their 87 page checklist for disrupting the Trump administration.  Provided below is a photo of one page of that plan captured while attendees were busy practicing their nose-up-eyes-closed-look-of-disdain sneer.

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Our reporting would be incomplete if we didn’t mention the best part of the evening, an amazing spread of comfort food provided by Michelle Obama, including chicken wings, fried cheese curds, little chocolate doughnuts, mugs of warm gravy and Lipitor.

 

An ugly mess

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Fakestream News in headlines

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If you listened, watched or attended the recent CPAC (Conservative Political Action Conference) you’d likely come away with a sense of American pride, unity and focus.  If you read the mainstream media’s account or even just their headlines, you’d get quite a different story.  Not only can they not help but interject bias in the news, they seem unable to avoid its intrusion in headlines.  This insinuated pessimism might make one think they were referring to the dysfunction within the DNC.  But no, they’ve managed to suggest that a cohesive, patriotic event was actually an exercise in turmoil, angst and equivocation.  Here are a few actual headlines as examples….

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Given this tendency toward hate-filled cynicism, we thought we’d contribute a few examples for the fakestream media to consider if they’re really serious about misleading through headline bias….

 

Ivanka’s perfume made from the tears of social justice warriors 

 

Bannon leaks news: Wash Monument to be moved to Mexican border as part of new wall

 

Misogynist CPAC has no representation from ugly women

 

Oval Office desk replaced with folding card table and bust of Hitler

 

Planned parenthood offices to be walled up and then closed by national guard units as part of training for the deportation Dreamers and people who like puppies

 

Metal detectors at CPAC just another symbol for a “wall”

 

Fed US govt to be moved from Wash DC to Kansas City, MO

 

WH planning a pamphlet describing best ways to disenfranchise the LBGTQRST-UVWXYZ community.

 

Not a single left handed, bi-sexual albino at CPAC

 

Melania a sex slave; Baron a highly intelligent robot

 

Minorities spotted at CPAC presumed to be named Tom, Uncle Tom

 

Gluton consumption rampant at CPAC

 

Racist Flag unfurled at CPAC during singing of Star Spangled Banner.  Referred to as “Old Glory” an obvious trigger to the elderly

Force fed meds

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rx-lr

Liberals behaving badly

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Liberals appear to be fixated with Hitler.  Note these classy quotes:

His supporters are like “good Germans” in “Hitler’s Germany.” Harry Stein, Esquire magazine.

 

“I could not help remembering how economic turmoil had conspired with Nazi nationalism and militarism—all intensified by Germany’s defeat in World War I—to send the world reeling into catastrophe… It is not entirely mistaken to contemplate our post-election state with fear and trembling.”  John Roth, Claremont College professor.

 

“We sometimes have the feeling that we are living in the time preceding the election of Adolf Hitler as Chancellor of Germany.”  Fidel Castro.

And liberals have been fixated for some time.  For these quotes above were actually pointed at Ronald Reagan the day after his election in 1980.  

Thanks to the folks at Liberals Are Nuts for pointing out the sheer panic coming from the left.  This list plus more have been compiled by Steven Hayward at PowerLine; see The Great Liberal Freakout.