The Weekly Standard
We’re sorry to see the demise of The Weekly Standard. It’s been a part of our routine reading material for several years.
The Long and Whiny Road
Paul McCartney, in an effort to become relevant again, has finally gotten on the Trump Hate Train. After all it’s what the cool kids are doing these days. We thought we’d try our own version of a musical lecture.
Hey Dude, don’t be afraid
You were made to sing songs – not politic
The minute you let Trump under your skin
Then you begin to let him win
Anytime you feel the pain, hey Dude, refrain
Don’t carry the world upon your shoulders
Just know that Trump’s a fool who plays it cool
By making this world a little better
Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah
Hey Dude, don’t let me down
You have found a cause, now go and get it
Remember, don’t ride your jet to far
Then you can start to fix the climate
So let it out and let it in, hey Dude, begin
You’re waiting for someone to say you’re relevant
And don’t you know that it’s just you, hey Dude, you’ll do
Your movement is on Hollywood’s shoulder
Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah yeah
Hey Dude, don’t make it bad
Take a sad song and make it radical
Remember don’t let Trump under your skin
Then you’ll begin to make it
Better better better better better better, oh
Does anyone care what Mark Sanford thinks?
The last person selected in the NFL draft each year is known as Mr. Irrelevant. Meet South Carolina’s version. Washed up Governor, washed up Congressman, and washed up husband. So CNN seeks him out for advice when it comes to tactful responses? Granted there’s a great deal of criticism Trump’s earned in the area of tact but please consider getting commentary from someone who isn’t carrying even worse baggage.
We wonder if the reporter could be bribed to ask Sanford if the Appalachian Trail would be impacted by the hurricane? In all likelihood though, anything that comes across as a dig against Trump, is priceless for CNN…. so never mind.
Washington Post: Trump complicit in hurricane
The Washington Post, never one to shy away from blaming Trump whenever possible, may have jumped the shark this week. Their editorial board has declared Trump complicit in hurricane Florence. Obama was more complicit in be-headings than Trump could possibly be in a hurricane.
If the Post is looking for other equally preposterous things for which Trump is deserving of blame, we offer the line-up below. Well, the Omarosa thing, yea, that one’s squarely at his feet.
- the 1969 Mets
- Woody Allen
- restrictor plates at Talledaga
- the classy love affair between Strzok and Page
- Gamecock Football
- the death of Frank Zappa
- 3-clasp bra hooks
- US heat wave of 1934
- dark stars
- poisonous mushrooms that look tasty
- the heartbreak of psoriasis
- cable TV going out last night in Buford, Wyoming
- Angela Merkel’s failed diets
- the broken bridge rail in Chappaquiddick
- the ice age
- Mario Van Peebles acting range
- rise of Nazi Germany
- fall of Nazi Germany
- Madonna and Abba
- JFK and Lee Harvey Oswald killings
- making most women secretly attracted to Melania
- Daylight Savings Time
- every girl that told Ted Cruz she just wanted to be friends
- English food
- San Fransisco sanitation
- Apollo 13
- cruising in the left lane
- Godfather III
- rationed airplane peanuts
- Hollywood movie recycling
- setting Millennial’s expectations too high with rise in middle class incomes and record number of jobs available
Our illustration above was too funny not to make a full cartoon out of it.