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And the winners are…

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We’ve finally gotten around to tallying up the award nomination categories and nominees that best sum up 2018. Trophy

You may recall that we came up with a few of our own early in December when we kicked off this event.  Check back at the original post for the complete list.  In the mean time, here were just a few:

  • The Disappearing Statesman Award – Paul Ryan
  • The Confused About The Meaning of the Word Journalist Award – Jim Acosta
  • The Most Likely to get Lost on the DC Subway Award – Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez
  • A Lifetime Achievement Award (Sleazy Politics category) – Bill Clinton

Without further delay, the winning nomination categories and nominees for 2018….

  • The Making Public Service Work for your Financial Reward Award – Diane Feinstein [submitted by Norris Johnson]
  • The Best Cup of Coughy Award – Hillary Clinton [submitted by Michael Bradford]
  • The Most Classified Information Released without an Indictment – Hillary Clinton [submitted by Russell Abbott]
  • The Just Can’t Let it go Award (aka Bad Loser Award) – Hillary Clinton [submitted by Todd Coleman]

Unfortunately, Hillary couldn’t make it this evening due to a nasty tumble over an empty box of wine.

Those listed above who identified the award categories and selected winning nominees have, themselves, won some fabulous swag in the form of a limited edition Confederacy of Drones coffee mug!  Stay tuned for future opportunities to win more stuff from your friends at COD.

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And the smirk, don’t forget the smirk!

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In a bold move, Robert Mueller expanded his investigative and law enforcement powers to include the authority to read facial expressions and assess fashion statements. 

Seeing the potential end to the current Russian collusion investigation, that so far has netted only post-election process violations having nothing to do with collusion, Mueller expanded his powers to include mental telepathy. Mueller explained that it was the next obvious step in the evolution of his authoritarian powers. “I’ve been given so much free reign in these investigations that sixth sense was the only possible new power to be exploited” said Mueller as he attended his weekly back-rub from CNN executives. He added that “fashion police authority was just a bonus.” 

Combining telepathic knowledge of what a smirk really means with the poor fashion choice of MAGA hats put the unfortunate Convington Catholic High School students square in his cross hairs … and indictment writing pen. 

In response to a reporter who accidentally asked Mueller a hard question about legal aspects of fashion indictments, the Special Counsel lead investigator replied, “And your Social Security number is what?”

Border Security for a buck

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Ginsburg discovers smoking

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Media outraged, Trump stole Obama’s foreign policy

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In a twist few saw coming, Donald Trump borrowed a page from Obama’s big binder of leading-from-behind strategies when the current President announced that the US was withdrawing from Syria.

When it was pointed out that it was Obama’s policy of ensuring at least one leadership vacuum at a time in the Middle-East, Trump counter-pointed that “Putin’s still there.”

But what about ISIS? They grew to fill the vacuum Obama left?

“Well ISIS is the main reason to leave”, Trump exclaimed. “I’ll get a really terrific bump when I defeat ’em again. It’ll be huge. Really terrific. A great bump.”