Cartoon
Why do I even know who Omarosa is?
So Trump fired Omarosa and Omarosa is now following the Jim Comey path of post-Trump financial fortune by telling her side of the story in book form. And you can trust her on what she says because she secretly used recording devices in violation of national security.
Shocker of all shockers, Trump cranked up the name calling. Omarosa is now a dog. She joins a long list of “dogs” including Ted Cruz, Mitt Romney, Arrianna Huffington and General James Mattis. Of course Mattis himself goes by “Mad Dog.”
In the case of Omarosa, we have one question, who let the dog in? Trump’s hired many that had to later be fired but this particular staff addition was baffling. We’ve identified a few other ill-advised hirings for Trump to consider if he’s looking to top the addition of Omarosa. We’ve even provided thoughts on how they could serve the White House.
- Maxine Waters – Office of Science and Technology
- Whoopi Goldberg – Economics Council
- Jim Acosta – Public Liaison
- Michael Moore – National Security
- Jane Fonda – Veterans Affairs
- Alec Baldwin – Dog walker
- Jeb Bush – Council of Fitness
- Robert DeNiro – Secret Service
- Chuck Schumer – Housekeeping
Chipotle at it again
It looks as though Chipotle is allowing us to recycle the old cartoon above. They’re back in the news again with more tainted burritos. To deal with this problem once and for all, we suggest a name change. Get the ecoli out of Chipotle. The name would then become hpt. Or as we’d call it, High Protein Toxins.
Do you like getting skewed by pollsters?
A recent poll noted that by 2043 non-whites would be in the majority in the U.S. and asked “Is that mostly good or mostly bad?” No “doesn’t matter” choice. You have to pick good or bad. Half of Republicans surveyed said “mostly bad.” Step outside and you can probably hear the screams that Republicans are racists.
https://www.prri.org/research/american-democracy-in-crisis-voters-midterms-trump-election-2018/
But! Ask any racial group what they’d think if they were in either the majority or the minority (and given no other choices) many would say mostly good if they’re in the majority, mostly bad otherwise.
So we’d like to conduct our own poll. Only one question, have you stopped beating your wife with a puppy while committing on-line fraud against St. Teresa’s Academy for the Homeless and then investing that money in cages for children who’ve been ripped from their parents arms by ICE using the jaws-of-life lubricated with baby seal oil? Yes or no
The many mouths of Democrats
The tolerant, coexist-bumper-sticker liberals seem to be oblivious to the fact that stoking hate is not trumping hate. It’s not hard to imagine a liberal beating you with a bull horn in between singing verses of “All You Need is Love” by The Beatles. Of course, it’d be their own version.
Love, Love, Love.
Love, Love, Love.
Love, Love, Love.There’s nothing you can do that can’t be fought.
Whatever you propose it must be stopped.
Nothing you can say ’cause we know how to play the game.
It’s queasy.Nothing you can make that can’t be lost.
No one you can sway that can’t be bought.
No more pro-nouns he or she, no more masculinity.It’s queasy.
All you need is love. (On the left now)
All you need is love
Love is all you need.
Love is all you need.
The language of DC
Clear bias on the part of the FBI while investigating Clinton and then Trump is spelled out in the Horowitz report … but the report concludes that no documented evidence of bias could be linked directly to decisions made during the investigation. Is it the legal system or the DC system that struggles with the obvious. No rational person could read the text messages between named and unnamed FBI personnel and think that bias isn’t in play. I guess the emphasis is on the word “documented.” It would have been interesting if the conclusion stated that
Although no documented bias was identified, they certainly loved Hillary and hated Trump and had the power, either subtly or overtly, to swing both investigations in the precise directions they eventually turned. What the $#%& was the FBI thinking?
So Mueller’s process for determining who should have high ranking authority in both investigations certainly must have been interesting.
Mueller: Team, I’ll need to select individuals to head up investigations that will have far reaching impacts on this country. A country, by the way, that many people actually love.
Strzok: Sir, I believe I can provide integrity in any investigation whether it involves Queen Hillary (Strzok bows deeply) or that vile Trump (Strzok appears to come close to vomiting but instead makes a hacking noise like a cat dislodging a hairball).
Mueller: That’s the kind of commitment I like to see. Let me ask you a question though. If Trump was on fire, would you pour gasoline or jet fuel on him?
Strzok: Sir, I believe that’s a trick question. I would have poured gasoline on him before lighting him on fire.
Mueller: Committed and intelligent, I like it! You’re hired. And remember, when you see Hillary, no eye contact. We don’t want to do anything that would appear disrespectful to our next president.
Confederacy of Drones 